Monday, March 2, 2009

A Cautionary Tale

If you happen to be an internet addict like me, then you’ve probably already heard about the newest hit blog making rounds on the internet (in the last week I’ve seen stories in at least five different publications and websites).

This is why you’re fat showcases pictures of disgusting, yet glorious (to some) concoctions that could clog the healthiest of arteries and add instantaneous pounds the thinnest backside. I must admit…I kind of love it, and I kind of hate it.

For instance, my sweet tooth and inner 8-year-old are telling me that the candy pizza is the stuff of dreams.


And my love of donuts in well documented, so I obviously wouldn’t turn away this “Behemoth Glazed Donut.”


But then I can’t visit the site without finding something that makes me gag. Like this:


A giant burger sandwiched between two bacon pizzas. (FYI, bacon and corn dogs/hot dogs and burgers are featured frequently on the blog. Hmmm…I wonder why?)
And I’m not sure why anyone would want to defile a delicious Krispy Kreme donut like this:


Yes, that’s a Sloppy Joe on a Krispy Kreme. For shame!

So, if you’re a glutton (heh.) for guilt and heart-attack inducing food, then perhaps this site is for you. But if you decide to try any of these fine dishes at home, please don’t tell me about it. I don’t think I could handle it.

Fortune Cookie Time!

I haven’t posted a fortune in a while, so I thought today should be the day. So here you are—a little wisdom from the bowels of our favorite cardboard cracker cookie!

“The best way to navigate through life is to give up all of our controls.”

While you’re pondering that, let me just say that I’ve given up control in my kitchen for the evening. I’m letting the slow cooker do all the work. And I concur with the fortune; this might just be the best way to navigate through dinner, if not life in general.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Spring Has NOT Sprung

I walked outside today and a strange thing happened—I didn’t feel like the wind was going to rip right through me and freeze my insides.

This, I believe, is a good thing. Perhaps some people like frozen insides; I prefer mine slathered in sunblock with a hint of a tan. But it’s also a little sad, because in a few days February will be over. March will march on in and take over, leading us out of our winter caves towards spring. More importantly, chili—winter’s official food—will take a backseat to more summer-friendly fare. Everyone will start shedding their chili cravings like they shed their cable-knit sweaters.

So, I suggest that we all take advantage of these last few February days (and maybe some of the March days too?), and get our chili on.
The following recipe I found on a fellow food blogger’s site, after having some serious cravings for a green chili, or Chili Verde, I tried while visiting my dad in Colorado. The pork and tomatillo base is a great change from the traditional beef and tomato, but you still get that familiar chili torso warming.
Also: The grocery store near my apartment in New York has a great selection of produce and ethnic foods, so I was able to find the chiles and tomatillos pretty easily. But every store is different, so you may have to go to a Mexican/Spanish foods store to find some things. However, when I was in Arkansas, I checked at the Kroger in Hot Springs, and they had a better selection of tomatillos and chiles than my store ever has. I was quite surprised…So, like I said, it really just depends.
Chili Verde
Adapted from Meathenge

When to cook: on a weekend or a leisurely day, when you’re not rushing to get dinner on the table.

1½-2 lbs pork shoulder, cut into 1-inch cubes
2 poblano chiles, charred, seeded and chopped
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and chopped
2-3 lbs fresh tomatillos, husks removed
1-2 cans of chicken broth
1 large white onion, chopped
6 large cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon sea salt
Ground black pepper, to taste
1 teaspoon cumin
Cilantro
Monterey Jack Cheese or Goat Cheese (both taste fabulous with this)
Tortillas
The original recipe suggests that you char the skins of the poblano peppers for maximum flavor potential. I suggest you do this, even though I couldn’t. The only open flame I could find was by lighting a candle, and that wasn’t very efficient. After you char the peppers, set in a paper or cloth sack for 10 minutes. Meanwhile, de-husk the tomatillos and wash. Pat dry and put in a roaster pan. Broil in oven until a bit blackened. Check every few minutes so you don’t burn them completely. Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in a large skillet. Cube up pork shoulder into approximately 1-inch cubes, and brown in pan. Add the minced garlic towards the end of the meat’s cooking cycle, and set aside when finished. Then sauté the chopped onions and put meat back in skillet. Turn heat to low setting. When the tomatillos are blackened and collapsed (they should be fairly squishy and juices should be running out of them), put them in a food processor or blender and chop up a little; then add to meat. At this point the pork, onions, tomatillos and juice from roasting pan should all be in the skillet, simmering on a very low heat. If you charred the poblanos, remove from bag and use a butter knife to scrape off the charred skin. Then chop up the chiles and jalapeno (be sure to remove the seeds), and throw them in the skillet. Add in the cumin, salt and pepper. Then add broth. Depending on how long you’re going to simmer the chili, you may or may not need to use both cans of broth. If you only want to simmer for about an hour, then don’t use two cans, but if you plan on letting it sit for a while, add both. Cover with a lid and let simmer for one or two hours. Serve with chopped fresh cilantro and cheese on top and with a warm tortilla on the side.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Peace Offering

I’ve been a neglectful blogger, I know!

(In my defense, it has been a crazy week.)

Anywho, I have a peace offering for my neglect—yummy, yummy Oreo-filled truffles. Last week, my baking buddy, Lindsey, invited me to come over and help her make these little Oreo chocolates as a Valentine’s surprise for her boyfriend. I couldn’t refuse.

Be warned though, these truffles are absolutely addictive. And the following recipe makes a lot of them…and after you’ve downed all 30 while watching an America’s Next Top Model marathon on VH1 (Hey, it happens!), don't say I didn't give you fair warning.


Oreo Truffles
Recipe adapted from RecipeZaar, although credit goes to my Aunt Carolyn, who introduced me to the Oreo Truffle at our family Christmas party this year.


1 package regular size Oreo cookies, very crushed
1 8 oz package cream cheese, softened
1 package white almond bark (we used regular white chocolate chips, since we only used the white chocolate for drizzling)
1 or 2 packages chocolate almond bark (we used both semi-sweet and German chocolate baking chocolate bars instead)
Sprinkles!

Using a blender or hand-held mixer, mix Oreos and cream cheese together. This might take a while if you’re using a hand-held mixer. Keep blending until there are no Oreo chunks and you have a smooth consistency. Roll into Walnut size balls and place on a cookie sheet. Chill in the fridge for an hour, or sit in the freezer for about 10 minutes if you’re in a hurry. Melt chocolate according to chocolate instructions. Stick a toothpick into an Oreo ball and dip it in the melted chocolate. Place on sheet of wax paper. You can dip all balls into the regular chocolate or you can dip half in chocolate and half in white chocolate. (We chose to dip all in regular chocolate and drizzle with white chocolate.) After all are dipped, drizzle with remaining chocolate and white chocolate. If you want to decorate with sprinkles, be sure to do it before the chocolate dries and hardens. Devour.

Makes approximately 30-35 candies.


And just because these things turned out so cute and Lindsey took such good pictures, here are some more images to enjoy! P.S. Those giant heart sprinkles were L's idea and they really just made the truffles that much more awesome!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

A few words about Valentine’s Day, because obviously, I’m an expert on this crap.

I’m a sucker for Valentine’s Day. I know it’s annoying and completely commercialized, but…I do love chocolate truffles and conversation hearts, so what can I do?

My approach to Valentine’s Day has always been to be cheesy and go all out. The trick is to not take yourself too seriously. For example, for our first Valentine’s Day together, I convinced Jon that we should write each other corny, ridiculous poems. We didn’t buy any gifts, we just dusted off our dormant “Roses are red” skills. And the poems were funny, heartfelt and sweet. To me, that’s the point of the day.

That, and candy.

We took care of the candy part last year. For some reason, we were sharing a brainwave and bought the same thing for one another—a heart-shaped box of chocolates.

With all the chocolate taken out.


In place of the chocolate we both bought the other’s favorite candies and filled the spaces. Mine was full of Sour Patch Kids, Snowcaps and bite-size Twizzlers, and his was packed with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups and Circus Peanuts. I thought it was perfect—thoughtful, personalized and tasty.

Because ladies and gents, if there’s anything you can learn from Valentine’s Day, learn this: the way to about 99 percent of the population’s collective heart is through food.

(Or, a gift certificate for a pedicure and full-body massage. Ahem. Just sayin’.)

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

What you might come home to if you’re dating the Hamburgler.


I saw this hamburger bed on Jezebel last week, and I just had to share it with my fellow foodies! If I were still somewhere between the ages of 5 and 15, I would probably be begging my mother for this. (Besides, she still owes me for giving away our PeeWee’s Playhouse chair-Chairy-at a garage sale.) Although, considering I never got one of those race car beds or a FAIRY PRINCESS CASTLE BED, I’m assuming that my rational mother would also deny me the luxury of sleeping nestled between a sesame seed bun and a slice of American cheese, my head supported by a succulent pickle.

P.S. I may or may not be hyperventilating over the castle beds in that link. The hand-painted ones, specifically. Le sigh.

Monday, February 9, 2009

T.V. Dinners, and Not the Kind You Microwave

I was trolling around on the internet the other day, as I tend to do about 90 percent of the time and I found a fun article on Delish.com. It’s slideshow of some of the most popular restaurants, diners and bars ever on prime time. Cheers, Friends’ Central Perk, Monk’s Diner on Seinfeld and Moe’s Tavern from The Simpsons were all featured. A good list, sure, but I felt like I could add to it since my viewing habits don’t include any of those shows. Here’s what I came up with (with help from Lucy and Liz!):


Luke’s Diner from Gilmore Girls. There is still a gaping hole in my heart from the cancellation of that show. If Stars Hollow actually existed, I would take a road trip and get some of Luke’s infamous coffee. And in true GG style, I might just order everything else on the menu to go and veg out during an obscure movie marathon. Seriously, Lorelai and Rory could EAT.


The Hub from That 70’s Show. Jon and I are on a That 70s Show kick. We’re Netflixing them all, currently on Season 2 out of…oh…8. Anyway, hanging out at The Hub and witnessing some crazy Hyde and Fez hijinks would be fun. Yes, yes.


The Max from Saved By the Bell. Kirby and I used to watch these reruns every day after we got home from school. Oddly enough, I don’t remember much about the show, except the entire theme song. And that they always hung out at the really awesome diner after school. Oh, and that feisty Lisa Turtle was SO much cooler than Kelly Kapowski.

Honker Burger from Doug. When I was a kid Nickelodeon had some of the best (and weirdest) cartoons (Ren and Stimpy? CatDog? The Angry Beavers? ROCKO’S MODERN LIFE???? Weird stuff). In this one, sixth grader Doug Funnie and his friends Patti Mayonnaise and Skeeter Valentine hung out at the Honker Burger. Plus, there are all kinds of random food references in the show. Doug’s dog is named Porkchop and his favorite band is The Beets, famous for their hit song, “Killer Tofu.” And who can forget Quailman?

And that’s all I/we could think of. Feel free to add your favorite T.V. restaurants, diners or bars in the comments!